Question: Why don’t we remain authentic and true to ourselves the way we were as babies? It would be so beautiful to just unfold naturally into each new developmental stage as we grow older.
Answer: The Critic wants to separate us from our true nature so we’ll be socially acceptable to our adult caregivers.
Question: What is The Critic?
Answer: The Critic is that inner voice that tells us we’re not good enough the way we are. It nags at us to model ourselves on some ideal person. At heart, it wants us to be successful but it goes about it in the wrong way.
Question: Isn’t it impossible to be someone other than who we are?
Answer: Yes. We can’t be anyone but who we are. It would be much healthier and life seeking to put our energy into developing our actual personality.
Question: You mean, we’re just fine as we are?
Answer: Yes. It never works to try to be somebody else. People fear that their authentic self will turn out to be somebody ugly and dark. But that’s never the case. All you’ll find inside is a very beautiful and real human: a human who hasn’t been bent out of shape by life’s soul-destroying demands to fit someone else’s pattern. You’ll be who you were meant to be.
Usually when we’re in our teens, we develop a really mean Critic in order to make us successful and popular. This Critic ends up ruining our lives by constantly nagging and putting us down. It’s important to remember that we created the Critic. That means we can cut it down to size. It’s our own creation.
How do you cut it down to size? Be very stern with it. Tell it to go away and come back when it has something new to say instead of its tireless rant. Tell it that what it’s saying is simply not true. Practice dealing with it effectively. Otherwise it will make your life miserable.
Any time you’re suddenly feeling shamed or depressed, chances are good that you’ve just been attacked by the Critic. Check it out. What were your thoughts just before you started feeling blue? It’s up to you to learn to recognize the Critic and prevent it from bringing you down.
For further reading read my blog post “Is the Critic” Ruining Your Life?