We all carry old messages, sometimes called implicit memories, from our early life. They’re messages we picked up from the world we were born into. They’re so much a part of us we barely know they exist.
What are your old messages? Maybe you learned:
-that you weren’t lovable
-that you weren’t smart enough
-that the world was a really scary place
-that you had to build a wall around yourself to be safe
Whatever your message, it’s probably not true in your present day world. It’s important to take a good hard look at these old tapes. They can be self-fulfilling.
-If you’re convinced you’re stupid, you likely avoid trying to get more education or a better job.
-If you consider yourself unlovable, maybe you don’t let people get to know you. Maybe you keep others at a distance so they won’t see how defective you are.
-If you think the world is such a scary place, you probably don’t take advantage of opportunities that come your way.
-Ask yourself if you really need to stay so hidden from others.
Once we identify our old messages, we need to take a good hard look at our current reality. What is the evidence for my stupidity? Are there signs that I’m not so stupid, like a graduation certificate? Or a good evaluation at work?
I’m unlovable? Is there somebody who loves me in spite of my faults?
When was the last time I was actually threatened by the world?
Are the people in my current world really dangerous to me?
It’s really important to learn what your old messages are and begin to change them.